Beyond the Gates
Thanks, I HATE IT! Amber Sinclair’s Weekly Soap Review: June 8-12: A Slap, a Tornado, and a Fake Who Gave a Fugitive a Gun
Brooke slapped her sister, Diane was in two cities at once, and a detective gave a fugitive his gun. Amber Sinclair watched it all.
AMBER SINCLAIR WATCHED ALL FIVE SOAPS THIS WEEK AND DAYTIME HAS SOME EXPLAINING TO DO
TL;DR: Brooke Logan called a bar slap “workplace violence” then slapped her own sister, a GH detective handed a fugitive his own gun, EJ DiMera flirted with a woman who can’t remember her own name, and Diane Jenkins managed to be both missing AND present in two different cities at once in The Young and the Restless, The Bold and the Beautiful, General Hospital, Days of Our Lives, and Beyond the Gates this week. Amber Sinclair watched all of it so you did not have to. You are welcome.
The Audacity Award: Brooke Logan
Last week, Brooke Logan co-signed firing Will Spencer for throwing one punch at a bar and solemnly labeled it “workplace violence.” This week she hauled off and slapped her own sister Katie Logan across the face at the office, and Ridge Forrester decided she had every reason to.
Then she shook on a “no poaching Forresters” deal and strutted off feeling victorious, never once realizing she had personally blessed her own daughter Hope Logan defecting to the enemy as a full-blown Spencer. The hypocrisy is one thing. Getting outmaneuvered while delivering it is another. Brooke takes the trophy and a complimentary ice pack.
Have a daytime double standard that made you gasp out loud? Send your best “the AUDACITY” picks to amber@soapoperamagazine.com and we just might feature them!
Okay But WHY Though: Cassius Hands Over the Gun
A fugitive was in Cassius‘ custody. All he had to do was drive Jenz Sidwell to booking. Instead he pulled over, uncuffed him, told him to flee the country, handed over his own service weapon, and then let Sidwell crack him over the head hard enough to draw blood so the “escape” would look convincing.
He is a detective. A working, badge-carrying detective. There were eleven less concussion-based ways to do this. We have questions, “Nathan,” and so does Dante.
Snooze Button: RJ and Dylan at the Bikini Bar
For three straight days, RJ Forrester and Dylan circled each other at the Bikini Bar, shook hands, complimented each other, and tumbled into each other’s arms during a dance she somehow always loses her balance during. The recaps themselves used the words “headache-inducing” and “filler.”
When the people writing the recap are begging for it to end, we feel seen. The Bold and the Beautiful, we have a beach, we have a bar, we have nothing happening on either.
The Ick Factor: EJ DiMera Makes His Move
EJ DiMera hit on Gabi DiMera in the square, got handed a “loser,” and by Friday had pivoted to putting his hand on Cat Greene‘s arm, murmuring about making “new memories,” and angling for hand-holding “and maybe a kiss.”
This is a woman who cannot access her own past. He knows that. He used it as the pitch. Days of Our Lives, the ick is coming from inside the DiMera mansion and his name is EJ.
The Dragging: Diane Jenkins Is in Two Places at Once
On The Young and the Restless, Diane Jenkins is caught in the east coast tornado, unreachable, with Genoa City frantic over who made it out alive. On Beyond the Gates, that very same Diane is wide awake at Martin’s fundraiser, getting ushered out of the way by Jack Abbott when the roof caves in, then strolling back through the wreckage perfectly fine.
So which is it? Missing in one city and accounted for in another, on the same night, in the same storm. The crossover timing got so scrambled that Diane achieved bilocation. We did not have “Diane Jenkins is in two places at once” on our June card, and yet.
This Is Why We Can’t Have Nice Things: Eva Thomas
All week, Eva Thomas was Leslie Thomas‘ sharp, scene-stealing daughter, the one trading barbs and stealing focus in every room she entered. By Friday she was on the ground, impaled, coughing up blood, passing out in Kat Richardson‘s arms.
If Beyond the Gates built this woman up all week only to write her out under a chandelier and a steam pipe, we are going to need a moment. Let her fight. Let her live. We were just getting started with her.
We Are Obsessed: Nikki Newman
Nikki Newman walked up to Victor Newman‘s table, looked her husband dead in the eye, and asked if he was ordering special pillows for the man he is harboring at the ranch. Then, when he ordered her to go upstairs and take a pill, she refused on principle.
Cold. Furious. Completely done. The Young and the Restless gave us a Nikki who is finished being managed, and we stood up and applauded our living room.
Biggest Brat: Hayley Lawson
Hayley Lawson clocked Kyle Abbott across the fundraiser, slid her wedding rings off before he came back with champagne, and slid them right back on when the event started. Then the tornado trapped them in a closet, where she made out with him, “apologized,” and proceeded to blast house music and dance while the building came down around people who were genuinely trapped.
A married woman doing reconnaissance during a natural disaster. Beyond the Gates, this brat earned her crown and the open bar she clearly visited first.
Which of these made you yell at your screen the loudest? Tell us in the comments, defend your faves, come for the ones who deserve it, and let us know which show owes us an apology this week!
