Thanks, I HATE IT! Amber Sinclair’s Weekly Soap Review: April 27-May 1 – The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly Of Daytime!

AMBER SINCLAIR HAS WATCHED ALL FIVE SOAPS THIS WEEK AND SOMEBODY HAS GOT TO ANSWER FOR IT

TL;DR: Kristen DiMera bashed a girl’s head in with a rock, Brook Lynn Quartermaine offered Trina Robinson a music career to absolve her own conscience, Eric Forrester moaned about the designs he gave away, Bill Hayes seethed at brunch over the wife he cheated on, Lucy Coe crashed a private getaway, and Phyllis Summers fired Michael Baldwin and went home to talk to her own portrait in Days of Our Lives, General Hospital, The Bold and the Beautiful, Beyond the Gates, and The Young and the Restless this week. Amber Sinclair has watched all of it so you did not have to. You are welcome.

The Audacity Award: Kristen DiMera

Kristen DiMera handed Sophia Choi a gun and a plan to murder Johnny DiMera, promised her a fresh start in Paris with a fat envelope of cash, walked her out to a remote bridge for the handoff, and then bashed her in the back of the head with a rock while muttering “stupid girl.”

The whole thing was a setup from the jump. Sophia was the disposable weapon. Rachel was the real reason. Kristen DiMera waited for the body to drop and then said revenge was sweet. We have not recovered.

The trophy goes to the woman who turned a teenager into a hit and a corpse in the same evening. Kristen DiMera, you are a monster and we cannot stop watching.

Send your wildest takes on this week’s most unhinged moments to [email protected] and we may publish your hot takes right here on the page!

Okay But WHY Though: Brook Lynn Quartermaine Offered Trina Robinson a Music Career

Brook Lynn Quartermaine hit Jordan Ashford‘s car. She drove away. She has been hiding it for weeks. Trina Robinsonwalked into the Quartermaine living room with a delivery package and Brook Lynn looked her in the face and said “you have an amazing voice, have you ever thought about getting into music?”

Trina is Jordan’s stepdaughter. The woman whose face Brook Lynn melted off is the woman whose stepdaughter she is now trying to launch as a recording artist. To absolve her own conscience. While Tracy Quartermaine sat there mouthing “Brook Lynn!” like a horrified Greek chorus.

Brook Lynn. Babe. We have questions.

Snooze Button: Eric Forrester’s Week of Wailing

Eric Forrester handed Katie Logan his designs. He went to her company. He said yes to all of it. Then he spent every single episode this week sitting in Ridge Forrester‘s office groaning “what have I done” while Brooke Logan told him Katie betrayed him.

Sir. You walked there. You knew what you were doing. The mirror exists. Look in it.

We need Donna Logan to keep telling the truth out loud because everybody else in that mansion is gaslighting a man who literally cannot remember what he did on Tuesday.

The Ick Factor: Bill Hayes Sulking at Brunch Over the Wife He Cheated On

Bill Hayes cheated on Dani Dupree with Hayley Lawson. He married Hayley. He chose Hayley. Hayley is the wife sitting at home right now.

This week Bill walked into Orphey Gene’s, saw Dani laughing over breakfast with Andre Richardson, and could not handle it. He hovered at his table watching them. He tried to insert himself into their meal. Naomi Hayes ran defense and shut him out. When Naomi suggested Dani and Andre might have a baby someday, Bill reacted so strongly he had to cover for himself.

The man who left her wants nobody else to want her either. Sir. Go home to your wife.

Unexpectedly Obsessed: Lucy Coe Crashing the St. Barts Trip

Ava Jerome sat down in the Metro Court Gardens with Jenz Sidwell and pitched him a romantic art-shopping trip to St. Barts. The chemistry was crackling. The destination was set.

Lucy Coe materialized out of a potted plant, sat down at their table uninvited, and gushed about how much she loves St. Barts. Sidwell suddenly remembered he had no time to travel for the next two weeks. Ava’s whole face fell. Lucy did not blink.

Lucy Coe walked into a private flirtation, killed it dead with one anecdote, and walked out victorious. We needed her. Bless her tiny chaotic heart.

The Dragging: Phyllis Summers

Phyllis Summers fired Michael Baldwin on Tuesday. She rehired him by Thursday. She fired him again Friday at the bar in front of his wife. Her legal strategy is “don’t lose.” Her plan to find a better lawyer was a list of three names, all of whom Victor had already put on retainer.

Then she went home to her stolen office, sat at the desk Cane Ashby used to record sad videos in, and started talking to her own portrait. “Why can’t I catch a break? Why is everybody out to get me?”

Phyllis Summers is being prosecuted by the DA, abandoned by her son, and reduced to confiding in oil paint. The woman needs an intervention and a new self-talk regimen.

Which show gave you the most this week and which one do you want to throw your remote at? Sound off below because we need to know we are not alone in this!

WATCH THIS: Who is coming to save you?

@soapoperamag You're Stuck on an Island. Which Soapy Hero Is Coming to Save You? Ten men. Five shows. You're stranded and only ONE is coming to get you. Some of them will send a helicopter. Some will swim. And some will show up three weeks late with a plan that somehow works. Who do you trust with your life? #YR #BB #GH #DAYS #BTG ♬ original sound – Soap Opera Magazine